


tomorrow's problem

by aohatsu



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bad Sex, Carrying, Collars, Crack Treated Seriously, Crash Landing, F/M, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Kink Discovery, M/M, Magical Accidents, Magical Artifacts, Multi, Pirates, Sea Monsters, Slavery, Smut, Tentacles, Worldbuilding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:01:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25665577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aohatsu/pseuds/aohatsu
Summary: The story is this: ReedfuckingRichards opens a portal, a mystical alien artifact that hates men falls through the portal, the artifact tries to blow up New York, Pepper dons the Rescue armor and takes the artifact through the portal only to be followed by Tony and the damn kidwho should have stayed on the ground(and has already received this lecture twice), followed by Reed fucking Richards finally managing to close the portalbefore Tony, Pepper and the kid got back through it.
Relationships: Peter Parker/Pepper Potts/Tony Stark
Comments: 5
Kudos: 39
Collections: Battleship 2020, Battleship 2020 - Ocean Witch, Battleship 2020 - Red Team





	tomorrow's problem

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Miri Cleo (miri_cleo)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/miri_cleo/gifts).



Interesting fact: 

On Critolpas, almost all females have at least two body slaves. One is a similar age to themselves, given to them as a gift by their parents when they reach maturity. It's a rite of passage, apparently, and the second body slave she gets to pick out herself when she reaches a certain level of status within the Critolpas society—usually when she becomes a mother or masters her chosen trade.

The slaves get to show off their individual stations by wearing shiny blue and purple collars made out of some sort of metal that's nearly as strong as vibranium but looks more like it’s been carved out of gemstone.

See, they happen to be on Critolpas right now. Him, Pepper and the kid. God knows he doesn’t know if he’s more worried about Pepper, being as utterly human as she is, or Peter, who’s barely turned eighteen and seems to think himself an adult when he _very much is not_.

The story is this: Reed _fucking_ Richards opens a portal, a mystical alien artifact that hates men falls through the portal, the artifact tries to blow up New York, Pepper dons the Rescue armor (desperate measures, she’d said) and takes the artifact through the portal only to be followed by Tony and the damn kid who _should have stayed on the ground_ (and has already received this lecture twice) followed by Reed _fucking_ Richards finally managing to close the portal _before Tony, Pepper and the kid got back through it_ , followed, naturally, by three of them crash landing on the lovely planet called Critolpas, which was, inconveniently enough, about ninety percent water and home to the mystical artifact that threatened to blow up New York because Tony touched it and also happened to have a dick.

They’d landed in the ocean.

On the bright side, they were rescued.

On the downside, they were rescued by pirates who wanted to steal their tech.

Back to the bright side—the pirates gave them a quick information dump on Critolpas society, which was to say women rule everything, and men are slaves, and men who try to rise above their stations get killed for their insolence.

Fun planet, Tony’s intrigued. He’d also very much like to go home and take Pepper and the kid with him before Peter gets executed for talking out of turn about Fight Club or something equally as inane and ridiculous.

Back to the downside: the mystical artifact that fucking brought them here? It’s apparently the egg of some sort of magical deity that has massive tentacles and a gaping jaw of death and doom that, you guessed it, eats men. Specifically men. Not humans, because it apparently has no interest in eating women.

This planet has problems.

But hey, their suits still work, even if Peter’s can’t fly and there’s nothing for him to web to that isn’t a giant, moving, rubbery tentacle, and Tony manages to grab him and he and Pepper—still holding the mystical artifact even though Tony yelled at her to drop it already—zoom off into the sunset, away from the goddamn mother kracken, queen of all nightmare fodder.

Not, unfortunately, before Peter got dragged under the water and nearly eaten, and Tony’s going to have nightmares about it for years to come, he just knows it.

“I mean,” Peter says, coughing up water as they fly off, “it was a tentacle monster so… it could have been worse?”

“Kid, I do not need to know the kind of porn you’re into,” Tony answers, and Pepper responds, “Tony!” while the kid turns red and sputters harder.

“What? He started it,” Tony defends, and then drops to the ground when they come up on a small, apparently inhabited by the number of people rushing out on the beach to gawk at them, stretch of land in the middle of the ocean. He drops his helmet and reaches up to tug at his collar he’d snapped on, just in case, sighing at the way his skin itches beneath it, unused to the friction of having a hard collar made of rock around his throat for so long.

Peter, already having retracted his mask, rubs at his too, though he heals too quickly for friction burns to be a problem.

Pepper, for better or worse, is still holding the goddamn kracken's egg. And _it’s glowing._

“Why didn’t you throw that in the water?”

“I don’t know! What if we need to barter with it?”

“Barter with it?” Tony blurts, incredulous, and before Pepper can answer, somebody from their crowd of admirers yells, “Shut up, slave! How dare you speak to your mistress in such a way!”

Ah, yes. This would be why they had even bothered with the shiny blue and purple collars they'd taken off the pirates who'd turned tail when Mother Kracken had shown up.

“She likes it when I’m like this,” he tells them. “She’d be bored otherwise. It turns her on to yell at me.”

Pepper, also having dropped her face-plate by this point, just groans. Peter makes a choking noise and starts to cough, face going red all over again.

Somehow—mostly due to Pepper being a people person, the crowd of people lead them to an honest-to-God resort hotel where they get to barter for room and board. It probably helps that Tony is at that point being distracted by the giant welt that he’s only just now noticed on Peter’s leg—his Iron Spider suit completely torn through, _shit_ —that must be from the kracken’s tentacle when it had managed to drag Peter under the water.

They do not want to fight that thing again.

“I have these,” Pepper offers, and she’s holding out her bracelets—two of them made of gold with diamonds set in, and worth quite the pretty penny back on Earth—but the woman at the counter sighs and says, “You have not described your service. Trinkets are useless without a service.”

“I don’t understand what you mean by service.”

“You must pay for your room here,” the clerk repeats, rolling her eyes. She glances at Peter, then at Tony. And her eyes deliberately dip, her mouth curling in disgust. “Why are they wearing those… things? Their faces are attractive enough though. Perhaps you could have the pretty one get on his knees for the older, handsome one. That would be payment enough if you are not wishing to provide the service yourself.”

Tony frowns. “Did you just suggest what I think you just suggested?”

To his mild surprise, Pepper covers his face with her hand and says, “Stop talking, slave number one.”

Affronted, he opens his mouth to talk anyway, but sees the shocked and wide-eyed look on Peter’s face and closes his mouth instead. He’ll let Pepper deal with the sex cult slave pirate lady culture on her own.

“Don’t worry, kid, you won’t have to do anything like that,” Tony tells him, quietly enough that he can’t be overheard. Peter looks at him, startled, and then his face flushes red all over again. At this rate, the kid’s going to permanently have red tinged cheeks.

“Uh,” he says, “I mean, if that’s—if I needed to—”

Tony covers Peter’s mouth with his hand and says, quickly, “Please don’t finish that sentence,” because really, it’s better for everyone if Tony doesn’t hear Peter say _I’ll get on my knees for you if I need to, Mr. Stark_ , with his red cheeks and his wide eyes and his wild, mop of curly hair that you could easily tug on while fucking your cock up into his throat.

Tony mentally curses, and forces himself not to think about it. To purge the idea from his head. No. Not an option. _No, Tony, for sake of everything good in your life, do not even think about it._

He turns back to Pepper’s discussion with the clerk, and hears, “—you’re saying that the only form of payment acceptable on this planet _is to have sex in public?_ ” She’s nearly screeching it, which, yeah, fair.

They end up back out on the beach, and Tony, for the first time—distracted as he was before by tentacle monsters and Peter’s injury and ripped suit and Pepper’s decision to keep the fucking egg—notices that while all of the women are dressed in pirate-y outfits he’d expect, every single man they see, most of them timidly standing behind the women—are completely, absolutely naked.

Well, other than the collars and the occasional leash.

They sit in the sand. Peter seems to have noticed the naked people because he’s staring at the sky, face as red as a tomato again and very obviously not looking anywhere else.

Pepper leans against Tony tiredly and starts rubbing at her temples.

“Alright,” Tony says, “we need a plan to get off this planet.”

“You need to sacrifice to Seokiddian,” a woman near them says, one eyebrow raised. “Only then will she open the gate to new worlds.”

Pepper says, “What?”

The woman rolls her eyes and tugs on the leash attached to the man behind her. There’s a younger guy clinging to him, staring at Tony and Peter with curiosity. “You’re clearly not from this planet. Our slaves don’t wear clothes here; it’s a disgrace. Their bodies were designed for us to admire, not to be hidden by… hideous metal trousers.”

 _Hideous metal trousers?_ Tony’s designs are _flawless_ —

“Go to the sea, offer up a sacrifice—either of your slaves would do—and Seokiddian, our deity, will open the door for you to go through to whichever planet you think of. It’s the only way.”

Pepper frowns. “I can’t sacrifice either of my,” she pauses, and then continues with obvious distaste, “slaves.”

The woman shrugs. “Then find someone else or settle in.” With that, she turns and leaves, dragging her slaves behind her like they’re dogs she’s taking on a walk. He really doesn’t like this planet.

Peter has a bright idea and says, “Why don’t we just give it back it’s egg and see if that works?”

 _God_ , Tony is tired.

Well, it’s worth a shot.

It works, but only after Tony has lost the bottom half of his suit and nearly been violated in a way that makes his joke about tentacle porn earlier much less funny, Peter’s lost his mask and has another rip in his suit right across the abdomen where a damn tentacle shaped hickie on his belly shines through, and Pepper has to drag them both through the portal when it opens what with Peter’s suit unable to fly and Tony’s repulsor boots lost to the kracken as a delicious snack, apparently.

They land in a bloody, bruised, wet heap in the middle of Central Park.

Tony decides to just lay there on his back in the grass for a minute. Pepper is half on top of him, and Peter is half on top of her _and_ him, his hip in an awkwardly unfortunate place—though Tony is old and tired and dirty enough that there’s no instant reaction from his dick which he’s both thankful for and oddly irritated by.

He isn’t that old. He’s only fifty.

God, he’s old.

“Back to the compound?” Pepper mutters against Tony’s neck.

Oh, there, yeah, his dick is coming to life after all.

Peter mumbles an affirmative and seems to squirm, his knee bumping against Tony's crotchtcrotch make things just that little bit worse.

“Yeah,” Tony says, “before people start taking pictures of this.”

(Too late for that. It’s always too late for that.)

They get back to the compound and crash onto the couch in the living room, suits long gone. Rhodey and Vision are the only Avengers living there, and neither of them appear to be around, so Tony only has the regular reasons to be guilty when he says, exhausted and without giving permission to his mouth to say it, “Kid, if you’re still up for that blowjob, I’ll take it.”

Like clockwork, the kid’s face flushes red and his eyes go as wide as plates.

Pepper smacks Tony's face softly and says, “Peter, he’s not serious. He has a terrible sense of humor.”

“Um.”

Pepper glances down—Tony’s hard-on very much visible where he’s wearing nothing but his jogging sweats from earlier in the day before Reed fucking Richards opened a portal to pirate hell—and says, “Oh, for the love of—Tony, really?”

He shrugs, helplessly, and says, “You’re both lying on top of me, what do you expect to happen?”

Pepper rolls her eyes while Peter continues to stare in shock.

“You know what? Fine,” Pepper says, clearly also crazy from exhaustion and maybe (probably) (at least a little) turned on by the collar still around Tony’s throat. She slips her fingers under the waist band of his pants and wraps her hand around his cock, making him groan and thrust up into her grip. It’s dry despite the fact that they’re all still wet from their multiple dips in sea monster-infested portal water, but God, he’s a sucker for the way Pepper’s nails are just sharp enough to mix a little discomfort in with the pleasure of a good hand job.

Peter makes a strangled noise in his throat and says, “Oh my God, oh my _God_ , I—I can leave—I—should I leave?”

Tony says, “No,” at the same time that Pepper says, “Only if you want to.”

Well, at least they’re mostly on the same page here and Tony’s momentary worries about _that_ particular issue can go into the trash. Peter, still sitting next to them on the couch, eyes still wide and face still flushed red, gives them a dignified, “Uh,” as a reply.

Helpful.

“Come on, Pete,” Tony says, and he’s going to go to hell—or maybe not, if Pepper’s into it then it’s probably fine, she’s as close to a moral compass as he can get sometimes—because he adds, “Pepper’ll show you what to do.”

Pepper must be into this idea, because she surges forward and kisses Tony, biting his bottom lip and taking her hand off his cock to yank his sweats down his thighs, letting his cock pop up like a damn jack-in-the-box toy which is—a terrible metaphor, God, where does he come up with this shit sometimes? It has to be the exhaustion.

He closes his eyes and sinks into Pepper’s kiss, only jerking his hips up clumsily when he feels Pepper tug Peter’s hand onto his cock, gently wrapping his hands around the base and helping him slide to the tip and grip tighter at the head, just the way Tony likes it.

Pepper stops kissing him and instead turns to watch her hand on Peter’s on Tony’s cock, which—yeah, yes, that’s a sight that Tony will never forget.

“Is this okay?” Peter asks, shifting awkwardly, and Tony groans in response. It takes a few minutes of this, Peter’s hand jerkily speeding up and slowing down at odd intervals—he’s clearly inexperienced, despite Pepper’s encouragements—for Tony to finally come and melt into the couch cushions like some sort of sprawled out limp noodle.

He is so, so tired.

Pepper climbs onto Peter’s lap, and things are moving quickly but Tony’s not complaining. He shifts enough to have a hand on Pepper’s warm thigh as she sinks onto Peter’s cock, Peter sucking in a gasping breath when his cock is suddenly surrounded by Pepper’s wet heat. The welt on his leg is nearly healed, the bruise on his stomach a dark purple already.

He holds Pepper’s hips and fucks up into her, his expression full of disbelief and need. Pepper runs a hand over the collar he’s still wearing. That’s definitely a kink for her, Tony thinks, blearily. That’ll be fun.

Peter is eighteen, though, and it hardly takes long for him to come.

Kindly, Tony doesn’t say a word about premature ejaculation and instead says, “Time to learn how to use your tongue, kid.”

And alright, _that’ll_ be a sight worth remembering for the rest of his days, Peter’s head between Pepper’s freckled thighs as she arches her back on the couch and Peter uses his mouth on her with every bit of enthusiasm an eighteen-year-old virgin can muster. 

If he was younger, Tony would get hard again just from watching Pepper come on Peter’s tongue.

After, once they’re all done catching their breath and, in Tony’s case, nearly nodding off then and there, Pepper smacks Tony’s ass and says, “Bed. Before Rhodey gets here and sees us like this.”

Blinking tiredly, Tony shifts and forces himself up while saying, “He’s seen me do worse.”

“He hasn’t seen me doing worse,” Pepper answers, and interrupts Peter’s, “Do you want me to leave—” by kissing him on the mouth. Dazed, Peter goes where she shoves him after that, and Pepper shoves him very pointedly towards her and Tony’s bedroom.

They’ll have to talk about this in the morning, but that’s tomorrow’s problem.

Tony shakes his head and smiles fondly, following them both.


End file.
